Tips

Introducing our guest blogger this week, Mrs. Porsche Adamas. Porsche is a Finishing Touch bride who just got married on April 24, 2010. After her wedding, we met up with Porsche and her new husband Micah to wrap up the event. Porsche and Micah couldn’t stop talking about how much fun they had planning their wedding, and how enjoyable the entire wedding planning experience was. Our conversation lasted almost 2 hours! It also dawned on us that she will be a perfect bride to feature on our blog: giving advice to future brides! So here it so, in Porsche’s own word, a bride to bride moment…

Image by Frank Amodo

“There’s just something about weddings that has always fascinated me. Maybe it’s the big beautiful gowns, the colorful bouquets, or just the thought of being the center of attention for the day. My husband may not have realized it at the time he proposed, but I had been planning our wedding for years prior to us even meeting! Can you imagine? Single and subscribing to wedding magazines and websites; if there’s such a thing as pre-bridezilla…it was me. Oh yeah, and I already had a wedding binder put together. *Note: my husband was not aware of the wedding binder until after he proposed; he wasn’t pressured!

So you can only imagine how excited I was to finally start planning our special day. I had considered every detail you could think of, from welcome baskets for guests to personalized favors and designers for custom-made gowns. I knew which websites had the best deals for this kind of ribbon, or that kind of favor bag, and even ring pillows for dogs.

There are a few things, though, that I learned during the “engagement” journey that I wish someone had told me. Here are a few tips for future brides.

1. Don’t forget the groom! Sounds silly but it will make the day even more special if you can make decisions together. Learning to compromise and communicate more effectively what you like/don’t like and what he likes/doesn’t like can only strengthen your relationship as a couple…because remember, you’re marrying that man ‘til death do you part!

2. Have ideas ready for vendors and bring them to the meetings. Meetings are more productive if you have sample pictures or a running idea of bouquets, linen, lighting, etc. You will most likely get instant feedback and ideas from the vendors, which can save a lot of back and forth emails. It’s also helpful to have a list of what you do NOT like – that way vendors have a clearer understanding of your wedding vision.

3. Make the best of the situation. For example, I had my heart set on big, lush peonies being the highlight of the bouquets and centerpieces; every time I saw a peony in a magazine or at other weddings I would get excited for our big day. THEN, about a week or so prior to our wedding day the airports in Holland shut down and we were not going to have the exact florals that were planned. Needless to say I was super bummed that week. But that day, our florist did a great job substituting other similar flowers and even surprised me with a bouquet of peonies! I’m not sure where or how she got them…but things just worked out!

4. If you can afford it, hire a professional planner. Now I know this may sound like an endorsement of some sort, especially because this will be on a wedding coordination/planning blog…but really…I would highly highly recommend a professional, non-family member to help plan. For one thing it makes that day run smooth – you do not have to worry about a thing! The coordinator(s) will tell you where you have to be and troubleshoot on that day so you don’t have to. AND, what was such a big help for me was that our coordinator helped streamline my millions of ideas into an elegant, polished, and cohesive event. If it wasn’t for her our wedding had the potential of being over-done and gaudy.

5. Last but not least, enjoy the process. It may sound strange to be giving this as a piece of advice but that’s really the only thing I would have changed about my engagement/planning process. It is easy to get caught up in the details and fixated on this shade of linen or having that type of favor. You will save a lot of time and unnecessary stress (and avoid potential disagreements) if you stay a little flexible with your wedding vision. Remember that some things just can not be helped or avoided. Ultimately your special day will be what you make of it, and you will probably forget that little detail you sulked over because you’re having so much fun!

I hope this was helpful, and the best of planning/engagement luck!

Porsche

*Note: you can find me on FB if you have any questions!”

I really enjoy reading Preston Bailey’s blog about common mistakes, so I’ve decided to write a blog myself, sharing some of the most common wedding mistakes I’ve seen or personally experienced. Wedding ‘culture’ is really different everywhere. This blog will feature some mistakes commonly seen here in Hawaii.

Image by Karlisch Photography

1. Planning too early. Yes, I said it. I personally believe it can be a mistake when a wedding is planned too early. As a planner, I encourage my clients to start planning their wedding no earlier than 18 months in advance of their proposed wedding date. Most venues do not book any events until 18 months (some even a year), and without a venue, you really can’t secure a date for your wedding. I’ve worked with a few brides who were so anxious to start planning their wedding, they started booking their vendors for their ‘dream wedding date’ and later came to find out that their venue is unavailable on that day! The wedding industry changes on a daily basis. Yes – daily! What’s ‘in’ right now may not necessarily be ‘in’ when your wedding season arrives. If you put down a deposit for a certain style of chair a year before your wedding and later decide to change to a different style of chair that had just been shipped to Hawaii, you will be sad to lose your deposit. I usually advise my brides to start confirming design related elements no earlier than 4 – 5 months before the wedding.

2. Book all your vendors at once. At Finishing Touch, we encourage our brides to book all their vendors at once. It should be the first step of your wedding planning process. Although you may feel that some vendors play a more crucial role in your wedding and should be given priority over others in terms of booking (such as photographer, videographer and florist), you will be surprised that many other vendors (such as ceremony musician, minister, DJ, rental company…etc.) also get booked up very fast. Booking all your vendors at once  and making it the first step of your planning process will also help you to stay within your budget so there won’t be any surprises towards the end of the planning process. The last thing you want is running out of funds and just remember you still have to book transportation for your parents and bridal party!

3. Budget. I encourage my brides to always over-estimate than under-estimate. If you are expecting 100 – 125 guests at the wedding, base your budget and expense on 125 guests. If your guest count falls under 125, you will be happy to have some extra money to spend on that shaved ice truck you’ve always wanted to surprise your guests with!

Images by Shawn Starr (left) and Frank Amodo (right)

4. Wedding day photo timeline. Ok, here’s the big question and I know it will stir up some controversy – should the bride and groom see each other before the ceremony for photos? Do the photos really turn out better if they are taken before the ceremony? While some photographers would still prefer taking photos with the bride and groom before the ceremony (which is also very common here with locals in Hawaii), I personally think that photos actually come out better when they are taken after the ceremony. From my experience, brides are very nervous before the ceremony, and it shows in the photos. I notice when brides choose to take alot of photos with the groom, bridal party or even family members before the ceremony, she looks very uncomfortable in the photos because her ceremony hasn’t even started, and she still has a very long day ahead of her. I highly recommend taking individual photos (bride and groom separately) before the ceremony because the bride’s makeup is so fresh, which makes it a perfect time to do personal portraits. However, I usually recommend my bride and groom to take photos after the ceremony when their guests are having cocktails. The bride and groom are more relaxed and happy after the ceremony since the hard part is over, and they are just waiting for the party to start!

5. Put way too much focus on the centerpiece, alone. If you look at an event photo taken from ten years ago, you will probably see a big and lush centerpiece in the center of the table. The table will be draped in white polyester linen (not floor length), with white napkins and white folding chairs. Event design has come a long way, and beautiful event is created with more than just a big floral centerpiece. Sometimes my brides will come to me with 20 photos of centerpieces they love, but no inspiration photos for linens and lighting. I personally believe a floral centerpiece requires a beautiful linen and properly set place setting to enhance it. I always remind my brides that their decor budget should really include four things: floral, lighting, linen and decor rentals. If your budget for a centerpiece is $200 per table, I encourage splitting the budget into three: $125 for the floral centerpiece, $50 for linens and napkins, $25 for custom chair (such as chair cover, chivari chair or chameleon chair) and candlelight.